Style Matters?
Part Two

Today in Vancouver, Spring has sprung. It is a gorgeous day and while I love some sun and fun as much as the next guy, I dread the fashion mishaps the warmer weather is sure to bring.

I will start by saying that I may have offended some people with my last Fashion Matters post and I am aware that what I say means very little. I’m here to amuse and, occasionally make you ponder, gentle reader. If I make your choices when it comes to what you wear easier and can stop even one of you from a huge fashion catastrophe (fashtastrophe?) and I have to offend one or two of you along the way, so be it.

I will say it, and I say and do it all for you.

Ahem….as the weather gets warmer in your part of the world, I would like to suggest, albeit ever so gently, that men stop wearing any type of shoe that shows any part of your foot. So, if you’re not a gladiator (so was she) or performing in a swords n’ sandals epic film, or cross-dressing, please don’t wear sandals. I know they make all kinds of butch, Velcro type sandals, and I know that you really want to wear them, but please don’t. Sandals all for ladies’ delicate feet and when you put your big, dumb, hairy feet in ‘em you have done the footwear equivalent of Milton Berle in drag.

Which brings me to flip flops or as we called them when I was a child, Thongs. Thongs mean something totally different now and so they’ve been dubbed flip flops. Again, this is for all my fella readers. Get rid of your ugly flip flops, please. Unless you are also wearing your hair in curlers, a Hawaiin-print mumu, and are “out on the stoop” there is no reason, and therefore no context.

There are more Spring things that should never be worn and I may talk about them down the road. I don’t want to blow my load to early in the season. Just try and think about context and what you’re wearing.